Single mom dating and kids Audrey bitoni online dating
When I got separated over a year ago, I thought I would never date again. That sounded about right — I needed time to decompress. We enjoy adult company, and sometimes that happens while talking to someone we are deeply attracted to over a glass of wine. It didn’t feel it was right for me and I wanted to meet someone organically while out on a run, at the grocery store, or while picking my kids up from school. And after talking with another single girlfriend who told me I needed to just do it, give it time, and realize I would talk to a lot of men and only connect with a few — I decided I’d think about it.
I was so busy with my kids, thigh-deep into my career, and didn’t want to give up “me” time. Plus, I love getting dressed up, wearing heels, and talking to a man. The following night, when my kids told me I should go on (for old people) because I’d probably go out on more dates that way, I realized I should give it a try. Since then, I’ve learned a few things about what it’s like being a single mom who is meeting people online.
You will get invitations to “have drinks and see where the night takes you” — translation, let’s hook up. I don’t want a pen pal; I want to genuinely get to know people.
If you are interested in that, it can be deliciously fun. These are the men you will have the best conversations with (I have found) — the men who genuinely want to get to know you with no expectations. Not only that, when you do the asking, if they hesitate, move on. There is a lot of letting go and moving on happening in the online dating world.
Here are a few things to think about if you’re a single mom who’s about to start dating guys online. I’ve never met him, and I refuse to get attached or get my hopes up until there have been a few dates and we are on the same page.
For example, I have a date tonight and he might cancel. As a single mom, you might feel like your options are limited, but they really aren’t.
When you have talked about exclusivity and are both sure you share the same vision for the future of your relationship, then you can introduce the kids.
As a single mom of two, my dating life borders on “barely alive” at best.
When an opportunity came recently to spend the night in some shady motel with an incredibly hot man whom I’d only talked to on the phone twice, I scrambled to make arrangements for friends to watch my kids, ages 2 and 9.
The most important being: You have to know who you are, have self-confidence, and not let the pettiness of it get to you.
Which I believe is true for all people who are putting themselves out there — but single moms are living a very different life than someone without kids, and dating takes a lot more out of us.